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Thursday, September 18, 2003
[15 EASY and HELPFUL STEPS to Securing Your Computer!]
I have a few very helpful tips for anyone wanting to secure their computer against the latest onslaught of viruses, virilli and the like. Don't worry, kids. I'm not only a computer expert, I'm also not a computer expert. But I am going to do my best to sound like one because I care deeply about the state of your computer's security. And I also care about you. But, let's be honest here: I really care more about your computer.
But enough of that. Let the "HELPFUL TIPS" begin!
15 EASY and HELPFUL STEPS to Securing Your Computer!
by Adam Brault, COMPUTER EXPERT
1. Make sure that your Windows Update thing is installed and running! It's important to install the downloaded updates and then restart your computer. This helps Microsoft feed your little computery guy his daily allowance of good things like patches and bugfixes and this sort of thing.
2. If you don't have the time to install the downloaded updates, don't worry! No problem at all... You can simply tell Windows Update to remind you in three minutes, when you are sure to have more time.
3. Visit either McAfee or Symantec on the web. Download one of their trial versions of their antivirus software.
4. Note that McAfee is actually spelled wrong. It should actually be "MackUhFee" Write this down. You will need it later during the installation.
5. Once you have downloaded your choice of antivirus software, open KaZaA or fire up Google and search for "McAfee serial" or "Symantec serial" depending on your earlier choices. This will save you from the future headache of actually having to pay for the software. [Of course, I'm kidding, Mr. Ashcroft! Mathcaddy.com does not condone piracy! Unless it happens to be the kind of piracy that happens on "Talk Like a Pirate Day." That kind of piracy is A-OKAY!]
6. After installing your virus scanning software, restart your computer.
7. Upon rebooting your system, find the icon on your desktop or in your start menu that says, "Internet Explorer" and double click it.
8. This step is very important, so listen carefully. After Internet Explorer is open, click "Tools... Internet Options."
9. In the space labeled "Home Page Address," select whatever is already there and delete it. This address - whatever it may be - is actually the source of 98% of the viruses your computer has received in your lifetime.
10. In place of the previous address, type the following: http://www.mathcaddy.com
11. Then click "OK" in this dialog box. Then close Internet Explorer.
12. Then you take a pumpkin, big and round and fat.
13. Then you cut the top off; that will make a hat.
14. Then you carve a nose, a mouth, and shining eyes.
15. Then put it in the window for a Halloween surprise.
Oh, sorry. I accidentally inserted my helpful tips for carving a pumpkin. I apologize. I'll fix it later if I find time.
Uhh... badger, badger, badger, badger, badger, badger, badger, badger, badger... mushroom! mushroom! Oooh! It's a snake! Ohh--ohh! A snake!!
[Posted by adam.b at 11:42 PM]
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Wednesday, September 17, 2003
[Icon's Story]
And while we're on the subject of Flash, check out one of the most creative and impressive flash movies I've had a chance to see, "Icon's Story." It's short, but the sound effects from Half-Life just make it a real winner.
[Posted by adam.b at 10:28 PM]
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[badger, badger, badger, mushroom, This guy was smoking mushrooms]
Pam found this website, and likes to dance to it. How many loops can you listen to?
www.albinoblacksheep.com/flash/badgers.php
[Posted by Dale at 8:42 PM]
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Tuesday, September 16, 2003
[Macromedia Flash MX 2004]
WOW! All that I can say is that this is much sweeter than just plain ol' Flash MX. Everywhere you look there are new features! It is just absolutely phenominal! Now I just wish that I could make something besides a rotating man.
[Posted by steve at 8:55 PM]
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[Everyone, gather round, for I have news!]
September 19 is International Talk Like a Pirate Day!
Arr! Shiver me timbers! I wonder when "Hitler of the Seas" comes out. I hear they're in post-production, but they've run into problems with rendering the rotating stickmen.
[Posted by adam.b at 7:03 AM]
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on [Everyone, gather round, for I have news!] permalink
Monday, September 15, 2003
[RIAAck]
This is one of the best articles yet regarding the whole "RIAAAAAAA!!!! They're coming to get you!" thing. I love this point: "People listen to the average CD many more times than they watch a DVD. Yet CDs are languishing in stores and DVDs are flying off the shelves. How to see this other than sheer music industry incompetence?"
It certainly makes sense to me. Let's face it. Americans buy lots of stuff they don't need... I know I own more than one DVD that I don't think I will ever watch again. And yet, I bought it. Because DVDs are cool. And because they aren't unreasonably expensive for what you get. AND because they keep going DOWN in price instead of up. AND because I really did believe the reviewer on the front of the cover, J. J. Michner of The Spruce Grove Tribune, who said, "...ONE OF THE YEAR's BEST!" (Later checking, I found his actual review said "I would have to been living in a GULAG for THIRTY-EIGHT YEARS to call this ONE OF THE YEAR'S BEST!"
On a similar note, I also think the movie industry has a pretty good tactic: GUILT. Anyone else seen the poor set painter pre-preview advertisement by the MPAA? If you haven't seen it, the set painter says, "I don't think the whole piracy thing will affect the studio executives. But it will affect people like me. I just want to work. And I just want to make movies. Because I love movies... just like you do." Please, help the set painter! Save the set painter! They won't hire him to paint sets if we download movies.
That's a great tactic -- much better than suing the crap out of 12 year old girls and grandpas, but it's still kind of silly, don't you think? I mean, is it realistic that sets will cease being painted if piracy becomes such an issue that profits of the movie industry are affected? Maybe I'm missing something.
I can practically imagine the movie in the post-set painter movie industry. Every single film will be set in an unfinished garage and at the beginning and end of the movie, they will have a disclaimer that says, "You drove us to fire the set painter. Hope you like the look of blank drywall!"
[Posted by adam.b at 11:40 PM]
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[Scelbrmad eggs and bocan]
Wow. Scaaltpecur! Azniamg! Sutpnuoeds! Sptiud! I hvae no ieda why tihs is cool or ppaoulr, yet it is. And I relaly don't konw why I, too, tinhk it's geart. Peahrps it has sintoehmg to do wtih teshe rkcos in my canurim. Deos anynoe hvae any ieda waht wrdos I am sanyig? Oaky... I'm dnoe. Ccehk it out if you hvae lsot yuor melarbs eugnoh to fnid tihs ennarittieng.
Apparently, you can still read fairly well if words are scrambled but the first and last letters are still in place. You can try it for yourself very easily, thanks to lerfjhax.com, which has a word scrambler.
Wreid, huh?
[Posted by adam.b at 11:19 PM]
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Sunday, September 14, 2003
[Trampoline Bear]
Look, Mom! I got a pet bear! I named him Faceplant!
[mpeg video 1.75 MB]
[Posted by adam.b at 4:34 PM]
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